Joe Mac & Eman: The One Man Show with 2 People.

As we all know, getting tickets to see Joe and Eman back together again was a pain in the ass, but did we expect anything less?  I didn’t.  After being assed out of tickets for the 9:30 show, I was heartbroken.  I may have had in a breakdown that left me crying for 3 hours, but we’ll move on.  I was over the moon when the 11:30 show was announced; come hell or high water…I was in that show.  I made my merry way right to the box office the day those babies went on sale.  Joe said they were taking it “old school” with orders only being taken over the phones lines, but I took it a step further.  Since we didn’t know what time the tickets were going on sale, I sat outside of the box office for 5 hours.  Call me crazy, but I was getting into that show.  By 4:02, I had my tickets in hand and by 4:45 I had our table confirmed.  Jen and I were officially going to see the One Man Show with 2 people.

After waiting a long, grueling month the day was finally upon us.  Jen was a trooper, taking a train to NYC at 8am then back home again at 3am.  We had the whole day to play in the city, but our minds were on Joe and Eman.  We entertained ourselves and then met up with our pals Sara, Jackie and Kristine.  We chitchatted and laughed then grabbed something to eat…where else?  McDonald’s.  The 3 girls had tickets to the 9:30 show, so they made their way over to the venue.  After I hailed a cab for them, Jen and I decided we might as well make our way over there. 

There wasn’t much to do in that area, so we asked if we could wait in The Public and they agreed.  We made our way into a little corner and sat quietly.  We used the bathroom (which was backstage) and kept our eyes and ears open.  I don’t know why they let us stay there, but they were turning people away left and right.  We were just sitting there when I saw Jen tense up and say very quietly, “Joe.”  My heart fell out of my ass.  No matter how many times I see this man up close, he still takes my breath away.  He was talking and laughing with Eman, so we didn’t call out…but I did try to make my way to the bathroom again.  Don’t judge me.  Dudes walk faaaast.  By the time I got back there, they were gone.  After composing myself in the bathroom, I made my way out to Jen where we sat and watched 10 pizzas go to the back, whether they were Joe’s or not.  I do not know.  I wouldn’t be surprised if they were though.

At about 10, we went to stand in line and were about 15 people back.  We were feeling good.  That was until we found out the people from the first show were able to stay inside.   That was kind of messed up on the venue’s part, but awesome news for the girls inside.  We didn’t give up hope, because how many people could possibly have tickets to both shows?  Oh.  A lot.  When we were led to our table, we were taken to the back.  Granted the back was not far at all, but we had hopes of being up front.  Jen calmed me down and reminded me he tends to look out to the back a lot…and I was right in his line of view.  There was hope he’d see me singing to him!

We were seated around a few girls we knew, so that was a pleasant surprise.  They all asked how I was feeling and honestly? I was shaking.  I was so excited, I was physically shaking.  Jen and I chatted a bit, set up our table (oh yes…we had more gifts!) and waited for the show.  Being the amazing woman she is, Jen carved out 3 (plastic) pumpkins with “Joe and Eman”, “Griffin” and “Rhys”…which also lit up.  Amazing.  We set the “Joe and Eman” one on top of the candle holder that was on our table and lit that baby up.  We were set.

Finally it was showtime.  I saw pictures from the first show and they were both looking gooooood, so I was prepared for those outfits.  No.  They came out in bowties.  Jen and I looked at each other and just laughed.  Seriously, the first few minutes of the show I was just laughing.  Then Joe started pounding on two keys and kicked it off with “I Got A Feeling”…loved it.  After the line, “look at her dancing, just take it off” I was expecting more people to scream.  Noooope.  There were a few screams, then my loud ass mouth screaming “WAAAAAAWOOOOOWWWWWW!!!” People in my section giggled and I got kind of embarrassed, but this fool looks for where the sound came from and found me.  I just shook my head and stared back at him.  He continued the song and let out a little giggle.  So cute.

The week before the show was a difficult one for me.  My cousin ended up in the hospital and wasn’t doing so great.  I turned to the “One Too Many” album to lift my spirits, because it is hard to be sad when that’s on.  The song I turned to most, was “One”.  I love Joe’s voice during it, so raw and powerful.  When I heard Eman start it up, I already knew I was about to get emotional.  Tears welling in my eyes, I sat with my head in my hand and gazed at him.  I never thought I would see that song live.  I was just sitting there watching and singing silently, when I saw him glance over at our section.  My body peeked up in excitement.  When he sat on the stool, he started staring in our direction.  My direction…my eyes.  I couldn’t move, just stared back.  After he broke eye contact, I looked over at Jen, who was filming the whole thing, and she just said “I got it!”  Letting out a breath of air, I just continued watching.  Little did I know, she meant she caught a moment I will watch 1,000 times in a week.

Leading up to the show, the bickering on twitter between Eman and Joe never failed at cracking me up.  They are both ridiculously hilarious.  When they started it on stage, it was priceless.  Looking back, seeing them bicker in person is definitely one of my favorite things from the show.  You can tell they really are bosom buddies….oh I mean, best friends.  Given that they were both drunk added fuel to the fire.  I am thanking God for their consumption of alcohol.  The cursing, the insults, the antics…I could not handle it!  Their “raps” about each other pretty much kill me every time I hear them.

Did I mention I love how much I love drunk Joe?  A Taylor Swift cover?  Really?  I don’t even like her that much, but that was incredible.  It wasn’t incredible, because it was the best cover ever, but because of his faces and the way he joked along with the song.  True entertainer.  Then to walk through the crowd during “Cover Girl”? Coooome oooon.  Jen has audio from when he said, “Will I lose the feed if I go through the crowd?” and you hear me go, “Jen.  JEN. Jen, no Jen. No. He can’t.” I knew I wasn’t making it through that.  At all.  He made his way to the back where we were sitting and he just stopped.  Knowing I couldn’t afford jail time for rape (but seriously), I handed over our pumpkin.  This dude takes it, holds it up so Eman can see it and shouts “WE GOT A PUMPKIN!” then sings a line and mumbles “DAMN! I sound good.”  Way to pat yourself on the back, McIntyre.  He then passes the pumpkin off to Jen, climbs ON HER BOOTH and up to the bar.  Get out of here with that, McIntyre.  I was terrified, because with him being a little toasted probably wouldn’t leave him with the best balance.  I just put my arms up (as if this would do anything) to brace his fall.  Thinking he would go back the other way through the rest of the crowd, we relaxed a little.  No no.  He decided he was going to come back and jump back to the back of Jen’s booth.  I was just standing there staring at him silently saying, “don’t do it.”  I just pictured a horrible scenario.  He did make it safely to the ground though.  It must have been those neon orange sneakers. *side eye* The fact that he did come into the crowd was a wonderful surprised that left me pretty messed up.

The banter, trash talk and foul language continued well into the night.  Oh and so did the beautiful tunes.  One of those tunes was, “2 in the Morning” where one Mr. Donnie Wahlberg and Rob Lewis came out.  The place went ape shit.  Everyone got out of their seats and sang with them.  It was awesome.  Even though Eman helped write the song and Donnie and Joe sang it more times that I can count…they still fucked up the words.  I always find it entertaining when that happens.  Such a cool experience.

After Donnie and Rob left, Joe and Eman discussed how they were going to end the show.  I think they had to cut a song or two due to chitter chatter (I will hold my tongue on this though).  In the end, they decided on ‘NYC Girls’, “going through the curtain for 3 seconds” and coming back to do an encore.  I looooove “NYC Girls”, for obvious reasons, so I hopped up out of my seat and began dancing.  I was so happy to see this live again.  The encore was “Time After Time”…sooooo freaking gooooood.  I don’t know what it is with Joe and Eman covering songs, but they always end up better than the original. 

When the show ended, we just sat there for a minute.  We were both stunned into silence.  Never in a million years did I think I’d be able to see those two on the stage together.  I was so young the first time they toured, I couldn’t go.  I am so grateful I was able to experience it, especially with Jen, because she just gets it.  Thanks for dealing with me Jen, I know it isn’t easy!

After the show, we headed to the train station to wait for our trains.  Sitting on the floor by Amtrak, we were discussing the show when Jen goes, “let’s discuss a little song called ‘One’.”  Ok, let’s.  I thought she was talking about the little staring contest we had.  She looked at me like I was the biggest idiot on the planet and goes, “Umm…he said your name.  I have it on tape!”  Ummmm…say what now? He did what!? We watched the video and in fact, he did.  Son of a bitch.  I took a lap in the middle of the station and again…started shaking.  Can’t.even.deal.with.that.shit.

Joe and Eman, if you ever read this, you two are amazing together and need to do a full tour.  Your dynamic just works.  You don’t want to sing, just stand there bickering and cursing at each other.  That’d be fine too.  Thank you for adding another NYC show, so I could experience my favorite album live.  I will never forget it.

Jen's video of "One"...simply beautiful.